Now that you’re this far, I need you to know something.
I’ll tell you what to change in a second.
What I’m about to tell you is literally a snapshot from my own memory bank. The withdrawal hurt a bit. But I think we’ve all been through this so it’s worth sharing.
It’s a common battle.
Before I had my own personal breakthrough and learned how to efficiently and predictable grab control and get my stuff handled, it was a struggle. A real battle every day to fight through the resistance.
Business just doesn’t flow unless we’re flowing.
WARNING: Read what follows at your own risk.
It’s early evening, you were supposed to be home already but didn’t hit your stride at work until well after lunch.
So… You tell yourself you’ll have to make it up later tonight at home. Throw your stuff in your handcrafted messenger from Defy Bags… made out of reclaimed military truck tarp.
On the short drive home, the radio is set to ESPN channel 83 on SiriusXM. But it’s just background noise. You’re not even listening. The noise in your head is deafening.
“Why can’t I just get myself to ____________??!?!?!!!”
Boiling inside… Sometimes you feel like a hero when they run up to you and tug at your legs after a long productive day of work. But that is not this day… you just can’t stomach another performance on the entry way rug.
Maybe you’ll park on the street so the kids don’t hear the grind of the garage door.
“If only they knew.”
Breathe… Hesitant to drive the last mile toward home because you know if you don’t cool off you’ll spend the rest of the night irritated… you roll into an empty parking lot and throw the turbocharged SUV you’ve always wanted into park and catch your head with your hands.
While parked in silence, sitting in the air conditioned and hand-trimmed bucket seats that are supposed to provide comfort when everything is boiling around you and inside you… things are far from comfortable.
A love for your spouse and kiddies burns inside…
And in a few minutes from now, out would come the seemingly casual question dressed up as back alley haymaker to the temple…
“Hey honey! How was your day?”
Something superficial comes out of your mouth so now you can deflect and throw the question right back.
But you’re distracted, not listening. Not present… How could you be? All you can think about is that it had happened again this morning and the entire day was wasted because of it.
It happens all the time. Almost without my consent.
The iPhone is the first light on in the morning (and the last light off at night). You’re always ON. The 18 hours in between is a blur and doesn’t contain anything that I would call “freedom”.
Unless of course this was your idea of freedom:
ALARM!!! Hit snooze. Twice. Five times. Pick up phone. Check emails. Facebook. Then emails. Freak out. Billy Client wants more revisions by EOD. Get out of bed. No time for workout… No “ME” time… or breakfast… Shower fast. You’re behind already. Throw on clothes. Paste on a smile. Kisses goodbye. BLURRR… It’s 6pm… What did I get done today? What meaningful thing did I get done today? You feel guilty. Shameful. This can’t continue.
But you’ve got to make up for it, right?
So the evening is spent “with” the family but not with them. Because you have a cavernous hole of time you wasted during the day that needs filling in order to feel like you’re the man of the house…
So it’s all too easy to be irritated at anything that gets in the way of that.
“Hey honey I need to check something really fast…?” Hours later, the rest of the house is dark, the kids are in bed and so is your spouse…
You missed nighttime shenanigans because you were stuck staring at the blue light of a screen, disgusted.
The shame and guilt boil.
Guilty while working because I can’t get my junk handled and guilty while at home because I’m not being who I need to be for my family.
There’s got to be a better way. But I’ve tried everything… nothing worked.
My family needs me. I need myself. I need me to be me. They need me to be me. My business needs me to be me.
“If only I could just get myself to_______”
It has something to do with golf, of course.
The reason we business people have a hard time handling our stuff is the same reason bogey golfers can’t stay under par.
It’s just one simple distinction.
I’ll share it with you in a video you can watch right away.
Once I do, you’ll see how simple it is to straighten things out and grab the reins.